Timberwolf Creek Blog

The Engagement Ring – a note to my brides

Dear Brides:  Today’s wedding was particularly wonderful.  It was wonderful because the two people getting married are -well, just great folks.  I’ve enjoyed getting to know them on facebook during all the months of wedding planning, and Lynn and I have become friends.  That’s always an amazing bonus for The Best Job In The World.  But today’s wedding was remarkable for the ceremony itself.  Louie and Lynn personalized their vows – as we encourage each of you to do, because the ceremony should be meaningful to the two of you – and they added something to the ceremony that I believe has been missing from the sample vows we send out to all our brides.  You can bet it’s going to be in there from now on.

The ring exchange, such an integral part of a wedding ceremony, has grown and been refined over the years, until I’m finally satisfied with those words.  And then there’s that awkward moment right before we take portraits when the bride transfers her engagement ring back to her left hand.  It was a momentous occasion, always to be cherished and remembered, when that engagement ring was first placed, and so it is fitting that there be some recognition of that on your wedding day.

Louie and Lynn added this to their ceremony:
“The engagement ring is a symbol of promise and intention.
The intention has now been realized
and the promise fulfilled.
Louis, place the engagement ring, over Lynn’s wedding band,
to symbolize that the love that brought you together,
will always protect and sustain your marriage.”

Ladies, when rehearsing their vows, I had to read this aloud three times before I could say it without getting all misty.  Because this is exactly the way I feel about engagement rings.  The wedding band is all about deep, abiding love, and lifelong commitment, and the sacred nature of the marriage rite.  That engagement ring is about the hope and promise of dreams realized.  It’s about romance, and falling in love, and the thrill of finding The One.  It’s pink clouds and roses.  It’s love songs and being wildly happy and gazing into each other’s eyes and the amazement and awe of finding someone that could mean so much to you.  That should all be there on your wedding day.  Of course, it IS all there on your wedding day, but let’s take a moment and acknowledge it.  Honor it.  And make it part of the ceremony.  Let’s take a moment to remember how it felt when the question was asked, answered, and the engagement ring was offered and accepted.

And, having done so, I hope you’ll think of that moment every time you notice your ring, every time it catches the sunlight in an unexpected moment, every time you hold hands.

And thank you, so very much, to Louie and to Lynn, for making that a part of my life, and for allowing me to share in such an important part of yours.


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